Teman-temankuw... dan para mommies... post kali ini bakal cerita ttg apa yang terjadi 2 minggu ini yang sebenernya nggak bisa diungkapkan dengan kata-kata bagaimana persisnya untuk describe how I was feeling tapi buat para mommies yang pernah ngalamin...I know you would understand! and to those moms yang happen to read this as a reference, encouragement, precaution, prevention or whatever...my heart goes to you...hang in there!
Lanjut dari post aku yang terakhir..ngabarin kalo si Caleb flu plus molar-nya numbuh kan..
I thought since his molar has cut through, things will get better...EXCEPT that it just didn't!! It was much much worse! This time is the worst flu and teething that created alot of confusion, frustration, depression, boredom, and whatsoever u name it..
Well..that thursday evening (last 2 weeks), hubby pulang minta diukur suhunya..dia bilang kayanya fever tinggi neh...(hadohh my heart langsung sank down gituh...udah anak sakit, suami sakit...gw kayak single fighter di rumah ini..). trus beneran suhunya 39-an!!!
dan gak tau napa..mother's instinc-ku bilang something bad going to happen..and somehow kayak ada 2 suara yang bertentangan di hati:
A - Caleb aman lah ga bakal tertular. justru dia yang nularin daddy-nya and dia kan uda fever duluan and uda sembuh mestinya gak bakal tertular lagi krn udah ada kekebalan tubuhnya.
B - Caleb kayanya bakal tertular fevernya nih..somehow I just got this feeling!
kira-kira yang bener yang mana? yak..mother's instinc won without a prize!
kamis malem aku ngga bisa tidur..terus2an ngecek dahi Caleb...sampe akhirnya subuh2 gitu pas aku kebangun aku pegang dahinya..gila panas bgt..lgs cepet ambil thermometer..it was 39.8!!!
Jumat langsung ke dokter deh. tapi pas di dokter panasnya malah turun krn baru minum obat. Cuma buat precaution, disuruh test influenza krn panasnya tinggi and hubby juga mesti test krn dia juga fever tinggi. Puji Tuhan hasilnya negative.
Dokter cuma kasi antibiotik akhirnya.
And so the fever went on and on..up and down..up and down...
by the 3rd day emang uda gak pernah nyampe 39 lagi..paling tinggi juga 38.3 cuma anehnya it never really subsided!! Suami uda gak fever by 3rd day walau masih lemes sih.
By day 5 I seriously got worried karena fever due to flu biasanya cuma 4-5 hari aja..tapi ini kok nggak ada tanda2 getting better.
So I asked around and I got info from 3 friends saying that anak mereka juga flu barengan ama teething, resulting fevernya lama banget. Malah ada yang 10 hari baru sembuh. denger 10 hari rasanya kayak mau pingsan deh..lama bener!
Dan lucunya yah..banyak dokter nggak percaya kalo teething itu bisa bikin fever. Anehnya lagi banyak kasus tumbuh gigi graham barengan ama flu. Does it mean pas numbuh graham daya tahan anak jadi melemah? I think I read that somewhere...
But seriously... bener2 bingung jadinya..ini Caleb sakit apa..bener ngga cuma flu biasa and tumbuh gigi. Dokter uda bilang kalo tumbuh gigi gak bakal fever. Kalo aku bawa ke dokter lagi bisa disuruh test darah, kasi obat ini itu...aduh bener ngga tega deh..kalo ternyata beneran krn gigi tapi uda terlanjur test ini itu, minum obat macem2..kasian anaknya dong..
by day 6 juga masih sama..bedanya fevernya cuma 37.6 paling tinggi..
day 7...highest was 37.3
day 8... praise God fever has totally gone!
til now..it's a mystery whether it's really the flu or the molar.
But I did consult to another doctor whom to my surprise agreed that teething can cause fever and he did say not to worry about this prolonged fever..it seems that caleb was just having a tooth cut through.
but friends and mommies..
I tell u..these 2 weeks bukan cuma draining my physical tapi juga mentally. Stress banget bangettt...liat anak yang biasanya ceria dan aktif..kerjanya cuma tidur mulu, kalo dia bangun..bisanya nangis, minta gendong..sama sekali ngga mau diturunin ke bawah...kebayang kan capeknya gimana..
belom lagi saat itu hubby juga sakit...aku sendiri pun juga flu (tapi puji Tuhan yah...ajaib banget cuma aku doang yang ngga sampe tertular fever dan nggak tau kekuatan yg Tuhan kasi buat aku tuh luar biasa..baru pertama kali flu tapi gak berasa headache or lemes2...cuma meler2 doang..gak kebayang kalo aku ikutan lemes n fever!).. PLUS tiap malem slm 2 minggu ini tidur cuma 2-3 jam :(( -- ini baru capek physical..
secara mental...berasa depressed banget krn ngga tau ini sakit apa kok lama bener..ngga pernah flu seperti ini biasanya..dan pressure banget denger suara anak nangis, rewel setiap hari :((
and felt so isolated juga..being at home mulu...ngga bisa turun ke bawah walalu cuma ke taman seperti biasanya tiap sore..takut Caleb masuk angin..jadi sumpek mulu bawaannya di rumah :((
belom lagi bingung antara bawa dokter apa nggak..rasanya maju mundur salah...bawa dokter kalo ntar di test macem2 pdhl anak gpp..kasian kan...tapi kalo ga ke dokter lagi trus ternyata ada apa2??
dan walau day 7 uda no more fever, tapi my worries belom reda juga loh...karena Caleb ntah napa kok masih lemes aja, masih clingy, masih nangis2...buat aku jadi tambah bingung ini kenapa toh..mestinya uda gpp, uda sembuh tapi kok masih rewel aja. disuruh jalan juga nggak mau.
dan pas kita bawa ke taman, dia sama sekali nggak mau say hi ke stangers like he used to. aduhhh sedih banget deh...ke mana anakku yang friendly ini...rasanya penyakitnya kali ini really cost us alot..ngga cuma money, tapi dari banyak aspek life and mood kita smua. asli sedih bangettt
day 8. lega krn fever bener2 uda gak balik jadi confirm sembuh. hari ini ada sedikit kemajuan...Caleb uda mau jalan sendiri walau jalannya masih kaku gitu... 1 minggu dia nggak jalan sih..jadi ototnya kaku. trus dia uda mau say hi ke strangers di food court. cuma kalo orang itu mulai godain caleb terlalu aggresive, Caleb malah nangis kayak ketakutan gitu...kaya berasa insecured.
day 9. Caleb tadi ke gereja..udah mau say hi ke banyak orang dan uda ngga nangis kalo ada yang aggresive deketin dia tapi dia tetep keliatan masih ngga mau diganggu. well..at least udah better lah.. I hope dia soon balik to his old self which mommy miss so much!
Pokoknya ini the worst experience as me being mommy deh...anak dan suami sakit..OMG..
mana saya tidak pake pembantu, suster dsb.. nggak ada relatives yg bisa dateng dan give a hand..my hope comes from God only dah..
nah..yah begitu deh ceritanya...
I have no idea the next tooth yang tumbuh bakal kaya gini lagi ngga but I cross my finger and pray so hard that it wont happen again! please..please...please...
(note: but mommies..dont worry every child is different..urs might not have fever or diarrhea or loss appetite or etc during teething, but if ur child has it...i tell u now that u're not alone..there are other mommies too beside me, who has consoled and encouraged me for they have first been through this, so hang in there okay..)
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
The Molar and The Flu
Ohh poor Caleb and poor mommy and daddy to witness caleb in so much discomfort!
First, Caleb had diarrhea, starting two weeks ago. I quickly suspected it was due teething because it was in greenish color. I was happy because 3 days later, diarrhea stopped n poo poo back to normal. but 2 days later, it started again and very watery. Unlike the previous diarrhea..which was more frequent and continous for the whole week, this time was an on and off and sometimes watery,sometimes not..sometimes it was once a day poo poo and sometimes can be 2x a day.
Then last Saturday suddenly he was coughing badly, sounding with lots of phlegm..He never had any cough this bad before. So I was a little worried if this is a normal cough or not. On sunday I did decide not to go to church and let Caleb rest. Because since saturday night he wasn't sleeping well. He woke up for every 15 mins crying in discomfort. but my dear hubby said let's go to church, Caleb was not feeling well but he will be recovered..and our soul do need this. So okay..we went finally. And back at home, Caleb was getting worse with mild fever and running nose. But the good thing was I knew this was flu and not croup or anything worse than just ordinary cough. He just had cough with lots of phlegm, that's it.
Monday, we went to see Dr. Kumar.
He confirmed that...first, the diarrhea was due to teething.
second, it was just normal flu. Not croup, not bronchitis, not H1N1.
so relieved!
He did mention that alot of flu cases are in lately.
Today, Caleb's fever finally subsided..less cough and runny nose. but he got blocked nose, and again the diarrhea kicked in..
When I brushed his teeth today, I purposely touched his gum and noticed that his 1st molar has finally cut through!!!! OKay..so it is more confirmed that the diarrhea is due to this molar!
and I begin to suspect that the fever too is due to teething. Because so far Caleb's flu never caused him fever before.
ANd right after we confirmed there'r molar breaking through...Caleb vomitted his milk.
Then I remember that cutting tooth can cause upset tummy. so I gave him gripe water.
Now he's asleep.
I really hope tonight he sleeps better, anyway..since the tooth has cut already..should be better right? let's see..
First, Caleb had diarrhea, starting two weeks ago. I quickly suspected it was due teething because it was in greenish color. I was happy because 3 days later, diarrhea stopped n poo poo back to normal. but 2 days later, it started again and very watery. Unlike the previous diarrhea..which was more frequent and continous for the whole week, this time was an on and off and sometimes watery,sometimes not..sometimes it was once a day poo poo and sometimes can be 2x a day.
Then last Saturday suddenly he was coughing badly, sounding with lots of phlegm..He never had any cough this bad before. So I was a little worried if this is a normal cough or not. On sunday I did decide not to go to church and let Caleb rest. Because since saturday night he wasn't sleeping well. He woke up for every 15 mins crying in discomfort. but my dear hubby said let's go to church, Caleb was not feeling well but he will be recovered..and our soul do need this. So okay..we went finally. And back at home, Caleb was getting worse with mild fever and running nose. But the good thing was I knew this was flu and not croup or anything worse than just ordinary cough. He just had cough with lots of phlegm, that's it.
Monday, we went to see Dr. Kumar.
He confirmed that...first, the diarrhea was due to teething.
second, it was just normal flu. Not croup, not bronchitis, not H1N1.
so relieved!
He did mention that alot of flu cases are in lately.
Today, Caleb's fever finally subsided..less cough and runny nose. but he got blocked nose, and again the diarrhea kicked in..
When I brushed his teeth today, I purposely touched his gum and noticed that his 1st molar has finally cut through!!!! OKay..so it is more confirmed that the diarrhea is due to this molar!
and I begin to suspect that the fever too is due to teething. Because so far Caleb's flu never caused him fever before.
ANd right after we confirmed there'r molar breaking through...Caleb vomitted his milk.
Then I remember that cutting tooth can cause upset tummy. so I gave him gripe water.
Now he's asleep.
I really hope tonight he sleeps better, anyway..since the tooth has cut already..should be better right? let's see..
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Equip yourself with the right knowledge and wisdom!
Hi mommies..
please..please equip yourself with the right knowledge and wisdom about taking care your own child! and don't just easily bite whatever your nanny tells you..
Sebelomnya...aku minta maap dulu ya kalo aku ngomong di blog ini agak keras atau ada yang ngga setuju (which is it's okay)...
Gini ceritanya aku punya group di BB yang smuanya temen2 lama di indo yang uda pada jadi wifey and some are mommies too (the rest are moms to be). Salah satu temen yang baru aja melahirkan lagi ngebahas kenapa anaknya selalu nangis kalo dipindahin ke kasur..padahal tadinya uda tidur di gendongannya..
and so another friend replied: oh iya kata susterku anaknya mungkin capek smua badannya jadi pas ditaruh di kasur malah nangis.
Waktu ngebaca chatting-an mereka nih..aku dlm hati langsung bilang OMG...really? ur nanny said that??? to me..it really doesn't make sense!! (bahkan kalo aku ngga pernah baca buku tracy hogg skalipun, I don't think I would believe that answer!). Mana ada baby kecapekan ditaruh di kasur malah sakit smua...lebih masuk akal kalo jawaban susternya itu karena baby lebih merasa secured di gendongan karena dia bisa denger heartbeat kita. kalo di buku malah dibilang sebenernya kelamaan tidur di gendong atau di kereta atau di manapun yg bukan di kasur, itu malah buat baby capek. Make sense dong...coba aja kita tidur di bahunya orang...lebih nyaman mana ama baring di kasur..
I had a few minutes thinking whether to reply my friend or not. Well..karena aku ngrasa ga enak aja ngasi tau ini itu ntar dikira sok tau karena orang kan bisa aja mikir..mentang2 uda punya anak duluan, mentang2 ngurus anak sendiri lah dll..intinya orang bisa berpikir apa saja kan..cuma setelah aku pikir2 lagi..first the discussion is brought into the group and anyone can read and reply..if she doesnt want me to reply, she won't ask in the group but ask personally to the person she wants to ask..Anyway, yang penting aku akan kasi tau apa yang bener dan terserah mereka setelah itu..
so i told them that...
baby has a sleep cycle...usually a newborn baby has a light sleep first then the deep sleep.
Light sleep is when they are moving alot (their eyeballs, hands, foot) and they will easily cry or wake up if there's something disturbing like too hot, too cold, wet diapers, loud noise, or just simply by moving him from your hand to bed.
I heard many stories about mom's doubts and questions about their baby and they just simply believe what their nannies told them.
another friend cerita ke aku kalo anaknya suka nangis setelah tidur bbrp jam at night. Kata susternya..itu karena baby nya udah CAPEK tidur makanya nangis..jadi mesti dibangunin dulu.
I was like "????" when I heard that...baru denger gitu loh ada yang namanya capek tidur.
bener2 doesn't make sense... namanya tidur malem baby perlu 10-11 jam...kalo baru tidur 5-6 jam nangis...masak sih capek tidur..most probably mimpi atau kecapekan (bukan capek tidur, tapi during the day dia kebanyakan activities jadi overtired and malah ga bisa tidur nyenyak, atau having light sleep cycle and ada yg bikin dia ga comfortable).
suster2 indo emang ada2 aja yah...
bukannya tidak mendukung hiring suster. suster is suster...mereka bagus dalam taking care babies...dlm arti..mandiin, suapin,nidurin etc krn mereka uda dilatih di yayasan2-nya utk bisa take care babies. tapi soal pengetahuan yang di luar sekedar mandiin, suapin n tidurin..sepertinya suster2 ini lebih relying on their beliefs (aka kepercayaan mereka sendiri).
ada suster yang bilang anak rewel minum susu krn sawanan artinya ada 'makhluk halus' yang ganggu. Whateverrrr...masak hantunya muncul pas jam minum susu doang....iseng banget maen peek a boo pas jam minum doang.
yang ada juga anaknya masih kenyang kek..ato dia nipple confusion ya gakkk..
gara2 denger omongan begituan kalo kita ga punya wisdom bisa2 kita ngalamin kuatir dan takut yang sebenernya sama skali ngga perlu!
ngga kebayang deh kalo misal aku juga pake suster (aku ngga nolak loh kalopun bisa!) and ga equip myself dgn pengetahuan2 yg bener..kayanya bisa banyak ketipu dgn kepercayaan2 yang ga masuk akal deh..
suster boleh aja ngebantu kita...tapi gimana pun juga..kita para mommies harus lebih pinter dari mereka okehhh...
please..please equip yourself with the right knowledge and wisdom about taking care your own child! and don't just easily bite whatever your nanny tells you..
Sebelomnya...aku minta maap dulu ya kalo aku ngomong di blog ini agak keras atau ada yang ngga setuju (which is it's okay)...
Gini ceritanya aku punya group di BB yang smuanya temen2 lama di indo yang uda pada jadi wifey and some are mommies too (the rest are moms to be). Salah satu temen yang baru aja melahirkan lagi ngebahas kenapa anaknya selalu nangis kalo dipindahin ke kasur..padahal tadinya uda tidur di gendongannya..
and so another friend replied: oh iya kata susterku anaknya mungkin capek smua badannya jadi pas ditaruh di kasur malah nangis.
Waktu ngebaca chatting-an mereka nih..aku dlm hati langsung bilang OMG...really? ur nanny said that??? to me..it really doesn't make sense!! (bahkan kalo aku ngga pernah baca buku tracy hogg skalipun, I don't think I would believe that answer!). Mana ada baby kecapekan ditaruh di kasur malah sakit smua...lebih masuk akal kalo jawaban susternya itu karena baby lebih merasa secured di gendongan karena dia bisa denger heartbeat kita. kalo di buku malah dibilang sebenernya kelamaan tidur di gendong atau di kereta atau di manapun yg bukan di kasur, itu malah buat baby capek. Make sense dong...coba aja kita tidur di bahunya orang...lebih nyaman mana ama baring di kasur..
I had a few minutes thinking whether to reply my friend or not. Well..karena aku ngrasa ga enak aja ngasi tau ini itu ntar dikira sok tau karena orang kan bisa aja mikir..mentang2 uda punya anak duluan, mentang2 ngurus anak sendiri lah dll..intinya orang bisa berpikir apa saja kan..cuma setelah aku pikir2 lagi..first the discussion is brought into the group and anyone can read and reply..if she doesnt want me to reply, she won't ask in the group but ask personally to the person she wants to ask..Anyway, yang penting aku akan kasi tau apa yang bener dan terserah mereka setelah itu..
so i told them that...
baby has a sleep cycle...usually a newborn baby has a light sleep first then the deep sleep.
Light sleep is when they are moving alot (their eyeballs, hands, foot) and they will easily cry or wake up if there's something disturbing like too hot, too cold, wet diapers, loud noise, or just simply by moving him from your hand to bed.
I heard many stories about mom's doubts and questions about their baby and they just simply believe what their nannies told them.
another friend cerita ke aku kalo anaknya suka nangis setelah tidur bbrp jam at night. Kata susternya..itu karena baby nya udah CAPEK tidur makanya nangis..jadi mesti dibangunin dulu.
I was like "????" when I heard that...baru denger gitu loh ada yang namanya capek tidur.
bener2 doesn't make sense... namanya tidur malem baby perlu 10-11 jam...kalo baru tidur 5-6 jam nangis...masak sih capek tidur..most probably mimpi atau kecapekan (bukan capek tidur, tapi during the day dia kebanyakan activities jadi overtired and malah ga bisa tidur nyenyak, atau having light sleep cycle and ada yg bikin dia ga comfortable).
suster2 indo emang ada2 aja yah...
bukannya tidak mendukung hiring suster. suster is suster...mereka bagus dalam taking care babies...dlm arti..mandiin, suapin,nidurin etc krn mereka uda dilatih di yayasan2-nya utk bisa take care babies. tapi soal pengetahuan yang di luar sekedar mandiin, suapin n tidurin..sepertinya suster2 ini lebih relying on their beliefs (aka kepercayaan mereka sendiri).
ada suster yang bilang anak rewel minum susu krn sawanan artinya ada 'makhluk halus' yang ganggu. Whateverrrr...masak hantunya muncul pas jam minum susu doang....iseng banget maen peek a boo pas jam minum doang.
yang ada juga anaknya masih kenyang kek..ato dia nipple confusion ya gakkk..
gara2 denger omongan begituan kalo kita ga punya wisdom bisa2 kita ngalamin kuatir dan takut yang sebenernya sama skali ngga perlu!
ngga kebayang deh kalo misal aku juga pake suster (aku ngga nolak loh kalopun bisa!) and ga equip myself dgn pengetahuan2 yg bener..kayanya bisa banyak ketipu dgn kepercayaan2 yang ga masuk akal deh..
suster boleh aja ngebantu kita...tapi gimana pun juga..kita para mommies harus lebih pinter dari mereka okehhh...
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Emotional Development
I posted last week about Caleb going through some emotional development and recent post about he is having tantrums.
I found it in Hogg's book some info regarding this emotional thingy and I decided to point out some interesting highlights that catch my interest. I hope this will be a useful information for you (or in future)
What cause the emotions:
1. The Child's own temperament
the child's character itself will play a big role. If his character alone is sensitive, grumpy type...he would be more likely to get vulnerable and easily get upset
2. Environmental Factors
when house is not child-proof, our toddie can easily get injured and when they get hurt often means they cry often too.
Changes or chaos in the family can affect his emotion too.
Or when you have an early walker, he will easily get frustrated if he can't find a way and opportunity to be free exploring his new skill.
In this case, it is true for caleb. Caleb gets frustrated when we go outside having meals or his parents are having a long chit chat with friends while he just do nothing but sit. he wants to walk around and explore but most of the times he needs to wait til one of his parents finish the meal before he gets to walk. Of course he cant walk alone right. and that is why he seems bored and act upset on some of our outings.
3. Developmental issues
When a child is going through a separation anxiety phase, he will be so clingy to us and will get upset whenever he doesn't see us around. This happens to Caleb. I told you before there was a whole week he was being so cranky and so clingy. It still happens til now though.
Lack of vocabulary language can cause a frustration too. Toddlers by 1 year above should have understood what we are saying. He has alot of things in his mind and just when he wants to say it..he doesnt know what word to use..he sure knows what he wants but he cant say it...this can make him so frustrated!
The twos. well I'm not there yet. But people say (and the book too) that 2 years old is the age of when our babies get to be independent. they start saying I, me and mine. their willingnes too please their parents have decreased. they know what likes and dislikes. people often use the word 'terrible two's"
Teething. hmmm yes...sore gums can really affect baby's sleep, appetite and of course behaviour! Happens to Caleb too.
4. Parent's behaviour
I like what Tracy said that all children have emotions, it's how parents react to them that matters.
our children can get runaway emotions when parents get inconsistent, have different standards and argue with each other, and dont prepare the child for upcoming events that might be stressful.
source: Baby whisperer solves all your problem (tracy hogg) p.299
I found it in Hogg's book some info regarding this emotional thingy and I decided to point out some interesting highlights that catch my interest. I hope this will be a useful information for you (or in future)
What cause the emotions:
1. The Child's own temperament
the child's character itself will play a big role. If his character alone is sensitive, grumpy type...he would be more likely to get vulnerable and easily get upset
2. Environmental Factors
when house is not child-proof, our toddie can easily get injured and when they get hurt often means they cry often too.
Changes or chaos in the family can affect his emotion too.
Or when you have an early walker, he will easily get frustrated if he can't find a way and opportunity to be free exploring his new skill.
In this case, it is true for caleb. Caleb gets frustrated when we go outside having meals or his parents are having a long chit chat with friends while he just do nothing but sit. he wants to walk around and explore but most of the times he needs to wait til one of his parents finish the meal before he gets to walk. Of course he cant walk alone right. and that is why he seems bored and act upset on some of our outings.
3. Developmental issues
When a child is going through a separation anxiety phase, he will be so clingy to us and will get upset whenever he doesn't see us around. This happens to Caleb. I told you before there was a whole week he was being so cranky and so clingy. It still happens til now though.
Lack of vocabulary language can cause a frustration too. Toddlers by 1 year above should have understood what we are saying. He has alot of things in his mind and just when he wants to say it..he doesnt know what word to use..he sure knows what he wants but he cant say it...this can make him so frustrated!
The twos. well I'm not there yet. But people say (and the book too) that 2 years old is the age of when our babies get to be independent. they start saying I, me and mine. their willingnes too please their parents have decreased. they know what likes and dislikes. people often use the word 'terrible two's"
Teething. hmmm yes...sore gums can really affect baby's sleep, appetite and of course behaviour! Happens to Caleb too.
4. Parent's behaviour
I like what Tracy said that all children have emotions, it's how parents react to them that matters.
our children can get runaway emotions when parents get inconsistent, have different standards and argue with each other, and dont prepare the child for upcoming events that might be stressful.
source: Baby whisperer solves all your problem (tracy hogg) p.299
Monday, May 10, 2010
My active toddler
Lately whenever we go out, I get to hear comments from people..friends or stranger that Caleb is such an active baby.
Last week we went for a playdate with Alicia and Cheng Cheng and I could tell you how well behaved they were compared to Caleb who refused to sit in his stroller and wanted to walk around.
I was a little bit worried if my baby is just being active or he's more than just active...
Well, I just got an answer...
Have I told you that I love tracy Hogg's book baby whisperer?
Most of the time I feel confused, I open this book again and always find a clue about the situation I was facing.
In the book..it was explained that it is normal during early walker stage, baby will act like hyperactive. They just want to walk, run or even climb! the book says to give them even more opportunity for them to practice their new skill..
I was so relieved after reading it.
Besides, I found on the internet that hyperactive is not only being so mobile but it also means your child can't focus or pay attention.
Caleb is great at focusing on the movies he likes and reading a book is his fave. I am very certain he doesn't have problem with concentrating. People who know him - knows that whenever he is not laughing or smiling, he most of the time has this serious concentrating face when his eyebrow will look like this >< hahaha..
mommies who have active babies..esp boys! don't rush judge your child...it will only cause stress and poor child for being misjudged too..
Last week we went for a playdate with Alicia and Cheng Cheng and I could tell you how well behaved they were compared to Caleb who refused to sit in his stroller and wanted to walk around.
I was a little bit worried if my baby is just being active or he's more than just active...
Well, I just got an answer...
Have I told you that I love tracy Hogg's book baby whisperer?
Most of the time I feel confused, I open this book again and always find a clue about the situation I was facing.
In the book..it was explained that it is normal during early walker stage, baby will act like hyperactive. They just want to walk, run or even climb! the book says to give them even more opportunity for them to practice their new skill..
I was so relieved after reading it.
Besides, I found on the internet that hyperactive is not only being so mobile but it also means your child can't focus or pay attention.
Caleb is great at focusing on the movies he likes and reading a book is his fave. I am very certain he doesn't have problem with concentrating. People who know him - knows that whenever he is not laughing or smiling, he most of the time has this serious concentrating face when his eyebrow will look like this >< hahaha..
mommies who have active babies..esp boys! don't rush judge your child...it will only cause stress and poor child for being misjudged too..
the tantrums
I had read the baby whisperer again when Caleb was 10 months old..I was reading the toddler section. Realising that he would reach toddlerhood soon, I thought I should equip myself with some knowledge. So I came to know what it is called a tantrum phase, this is when your baby throws you a tantrum when he is angry or upset.
When I was in Jakarta, my nephew who at that time around 14 months had shown tantrums many times when I was there. He was arching his back and if you didn't catch him he could bang his head on the floor. I watched it and I was not surprised because I have read about it. I acted cool so that his mom did not need to feel embarassed. I knew it would happen to Caleb soon. This phase is just unavoidable.
Now Caleb is 13,5 months old and yes he is now finally in this phase. He would arch his back whenever he is upset and sometimes not only acrhing and crying but also screaming. Hmm..
But yes so far I just act cool..thank God I have read about it.
Anyway..
So I'm gonna write here some information I remember from reading the book, people's blogs and other resources about handling your child's tantrum:
1. Just act cool
a child can catch your emotions and if you are upset, he will be upset too. so be careful.
2. Remove him
let's say you're in supermarket and he's throwing tantrums that draw people's attention..get him out of there.
3. Talk to him
Tell him you understand that he is upset because .......
a child feels better when he is understood and tell him he needs to learn how to control his emotion too
4. Give him rewards when he has done well
5. if nothing works just let him finish his tantrums or just go home
When I was in Jakarta, my nephew who at that time around 14 months had shown tantrums many times when I was there. He was arching his back and if you didn't catch him he could bang his head on the floor. I watched it and I was not surprised because I have read about it. I acted cool so that his mom did not need to feel embarassed. I knew it would happen to Caleb soon. This phase is just unavoidable.
Now Caleb is 13,5 months old and yes he is now finally in this phase. He would arch his back whenever he is upset and sometimes not only acrhing and crying but also screaming. Hmm..
But yes so far I just act cool..thank God I have read about it.
Anyway..
So I'm gonna write here some information I remember from reading the book, people's blogs and other resources about handling your child's tantrum:
1. Just act cool
a child can catch your emotions and if you are upset, he will be upset too. so be careful.
2. Remove him
let's say you're in supermarket and he's throwing tantrums that draw people's attention..get him out of there.
3. Talk to him
Tell him you understand that he is upset because .......
a child feels better when he is understood and tell him he needs to learn how to control his emotion too
4. Give him rewards when he has done well
5. if nothing works just let him finish his tantrums or just go home
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Happy mother's day
Here are some notes I got from friends and I think it's nice to post them here. When I read these, I feel like..hey this is talking about me... this is me... it's so me...
and maybe u mommies feel the same way as I do
I am a parent, cook, housekeeper, teacher,nurse, handyman, maid, security, coordinator, supervisor, manager, secretary, nutritionist, caretaker, personal assistant, life coach, bookkeeper, laundry maid, taxi driver, and a motivational speaker.
I don't get holiday pay, sick pay, or days off. I am on call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Now tell me YOUR job is harder than mine.
(yes it's so true right..we do everything..really just everything!)
To all the Moms who have traded eyeliner for dark circles, salon hair cuts for ponytails, long showers for stubble on their legs, late nights for early mornings, designer purses for diaper bags... and wouldn't change a thing!!.. Mom's don't care what they gave up ...and will continue to give up for our kids ♥ Happy mother's day!
(oh yes..please look at me..I'm on my ponytail and t-shirt..my eyeliner is seriously missing coz Caleb threw it somewhere I can't find...no salon though my hair is so messy now-a reason why my hair is always on ponytail! and hardly shop for new fashionable clothes (but thanks to hubby who insisted buying me new clothes last month :) )
and I also like this quote:
"a mother looks with her heart and feels with her eye"
Happy mother's day everyone :)
and maybe u mommies feel the same way as I do
I am a parent, cook, housekeeper, teacher,nurse, handyman, maid, security, coordinator, supervisor, manager, secretary, nutritionist, caretaker, personal assistant, life coach, bookkeeper, laundry maid, taxi driver, and a motivational speaker.
I don't get holiday pay, sick pay, or days off. I am on call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Now tell me YOUR job is harder than mine.
(yes it's so true right..we do everything..really just everything!)
To all the Moms who have traded eyeliner for dark circles, salon hair cuts for ponytails, long showers for stubble on their legs, late nights for early mornings, designer purses for diaper bags... and wouldn't change a thing!!.. Mom's don't care what they gave up ...and will continue to give up for our kids ♥ Happy mother's day!
(oh yes..please look at me..I'm on my ponytail and t-shirt..my eyeliner is seriously missing coz Caleb threw it somewhere I can't find...no salon though my hair is so messy now-a reason why my hair is always on ponytail! and hardly shop for new fashionable clothes (but thanks to hubby who insisted buying me new clothes last month :) )and I also like this quote:
"a mother looks with her heart and feels with her eye"
Happy mother's day everyone :)
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Enjoy the moment
This week has been a very hard week for me as a mom.
Caleb seems to enter a new stage of emotional development..this development introduce him new emotions such as ' shy', 'frustrating', and 'more clingy than ever!!'
starting on last monday... Caleb suddenly became super clingy to me..well, he was clingy before..but these days he is even more clingy than ever before!!! the difference is that.. he would cry looking for me if he doesn't see his mom..and even if he already finds where I am..he doesn't like it if I don't attend to him..so he wants me to stop doing whatever I'm doing at that time and attend to him..he also loves to be carried by me..that's the only way to stop him crying..and worse is..the cry!! he cries like he is hurt so badly. The whole day he can cry really ALOT.. many many times...I really couldnt stand the cry..it was like my blood is going up and I did get headache on one of the days.. sigh..
He easily gets frustrated too..if he's bored, if he falls down, if he can't solve a problem with his toys.
I noticed that he is also more shy than usual towards people. Yesterday when he came to Gennext, he looked scared to step in, knowing that he was welcomed and surrounded by people who tried to entertain him. Well, he never likes being overstimulated and surrounded by people..(he doesnt like basa basi people hahaha.. he likes when people really talk to him and sincerely likes him and shows that the person really wants to play with him)..
but thank God, he adapted to the environment quickly and back to himself...walking around,clapping hands, and giggling around :)
there was also once when people say hi to him...he smiled to the person but came running back hugging me, giggling...like those kind of 'malu tapi mau' kind of thing hehehe
yea.. I notice this.. he was more shy but yet he is still my friendly baby who waves hi and bye to everyone.. I often get compliments from those strangers in mrt, lift, food court, supermarket..that caleb is a friendly or smart or cute little baby hihihihi...not trying to boast here..but.. oh so what... I AM proud of my son!!
okayy get back to the point that I'm trying to say..
this week is hard. I was so stressed and overtired..and sleep deprived. Caleb didn't sleep well too since monday and he woke up like 3-4 times a night..I only slept like 2 hours every night..and when he woke up, I have to face his crankiness!!!
I suspected teething. I didn't understand why at first..so of course I suspect it's the molar tooth coming out..I heard that will be painful. but he eats quite ok..yes, he was choosy but he still eats.
The last time he was teething, he always refused to eat, remember? this time was different..so I wasn't sure what was going on and not knowing means extra stress for me.
So i talked to my friend, Noviana, she has a baby who is 2 weeks younger than Caleb.
I am so glad i talked to her. Because the first thing she said to me after she heard my story: "same here" all the cry of clingy-ness, the frustration, the waking up again...she's facing the same thing!
OHhhh I was so relieved!!!!!
she told me that she read it somewhere that around this age baby is having a transition period from being dependable to become more independent and some babies are not emotionally ready for that. So I googled about this emotional development and I read some comments about the solution, which is.... JUST enjoy this moment!! when I read this..I was like... enjoy??? are u kidding me? it's driving me nuts!!!
but then at night I thought about it..u know..it's right! I have to enjoy this...coz this moment pass too fast and suddenly u realize you are at another phase where your kid doesn't want to be held anymore...that is when he IS ready to be independent..you will miss those moments when you can cuddle him and kiss him as many times as you want...well, there will be a time when he refused to be kissed! especially in public haha..
and oh..I also happen to read some posts in forum. Two mummies were stressed over their kids fall sick so often that they need to go to hospital. I think of that and I really feel their burden..I couldn't imagine having separated with caleb for being hospitalized..that thought is sooo scary!
I was already so heartpain when caleb was having flu..don't mention about a harder case than that!
so I think..my sufferings now is really nothing..in fact, it is a common thing..
I only face a cranky kid but he is at home with me
my sleepless nights..but my kid was still lying next to me..
I shouldn't be stressed over small matters
and so Saturday I woke up with different feeling..I felt I have gained an understanding that made me feel ready to face the day and his crankiness. To my surprise the change of my heart really made my day. I wasn't sure whether Caleb was really less cranky since saturday or it was just me who didn't really bother with the cry anymore..
and that saturday morning.. I hugged Caleb and told him 'Caleb, even if you fail and disappointed me many times, I will always love you and take care of you and will never abandon you'.
Caleb seems to enter a new stage of emotional development..this development introduce him new emotions such as ' shy', 'frustrating', and 'more clingy than ever!!'
starting on last monday... Caleb suddenly became super clingy to me..well, he was clingy before..but these days he is even more clingy than ever before!!! the difference is that.. he would cry looking for me if he doesn't see his mom..and even if he already finds where I am..he doesn't like it if I don't attend to him..so he wants me to stop doing whatever I'm doing at that time and attend to him..he also loves to be carried by me..that's the only way to stop him crying..and worse is..the cry!! he cries like he is hurt so badly. The whole day he can cry really ALOT.. many many times...I really couldnt stand the cry..it was like my blood is going up and I did get headache on one of the days.. sigh..
He easily gets frustrated too..if he's bored, if he falls down, if he can't solve a problem with his toys.
I noticed that he is also more shy than usual towards people. Yesterday when he came to Gennext, he looked scared to step in, knowing that he was welcomed and surrounded by people who tried to entertain him. Well, he never likes being overstimulated and surrounded by people..(he doesnt like basa basi people hahaha.. he likes when people really talk to him and sincerely likes him and shows that the person really wants to play with him)..
but thank God, he adapted to the environment quickly and back to himself...walking around,clapping hands, and giggling around :)
there was also once when people say hi to him...he smiled to the person but came running back hugging me, giggling...like those kind of 'malu tapi mau' kind of thing hehehe
yea.. I notice this.. he was more shy but yet he is still my friendly baby who waves hi and bye to everyone.. I often get compliments from those strangers in mrt, lift, food court, supermarket..that caleb is a friendly or smart or cute little baby hihihihi...not trying to boast here..but.. oh so what... I AM proud of my son!!
okayy get back to the point that I'm trying to say..
this week is hard. I was so stressed and overtired..and sleep deprived. Caleb didn't sleep well too since monday and he woke up like 3-4 times a night..I only slept like 2 hours every night..and when he woke up, I have to face his crankiness!!!
I suspected teething. I didn't understand why at first..so of course I suspect it's the molar tooth coming out..I heard that will be painful. but he eats quite ok..yes, he was choosy but he still eats.
The last time he was teething, he always refused to eat, remember? this time was different..so I wasn't sure what was going on and not knowing means extra stress for me.
So i talked to my friend, Noviana, she has a baby who is 2 weeks younger than Caleb.
I am so glad i talked to her. Because the first thing she said to me after she heard my story: "same here" all the cry of clingy-ness, the frustration, the waking up again...she's facing the same thing!
OHhhh I was so relieved!!!!!
she told me that she read it somewhere that around this age baby is having a transition period from being dependable to become more independent and some babies are not emotionally ready for that. So I googled about this emotional development and I read some comments about the solution, which is.... JUST enjoy this moment!! when I read this..I was like... enjoy??? are u kidding me? it's driving me nuts!!!
but then at night I thought about it..u know..it's right! I have to enjoy this...coz this moment pass too fast and suddenly u realize you are at another phase where your kid doesn't want to be held anymore...that is when he IS ready to be independent..you will miss those moments when you can cuddle him and kiss him as many times as you want...well, there will be a time when he refused to be kissed! especially in public haha..
and oh..I also happen to read some posts in forum. Two mummies were stressed over their kids fall sick so often that they need to go to hospital. I think of that and I really feel their burden..I couldn't imagine having separated with caleb for being hospitalized..that thought is sooo scary!
I was already so heartpain when caleb was having flu..don't mention about a harder case than that!
so I think..my sufferings now is really nothing..in fact, it is a common thing..
I only face a cranky kid but he is at home with me
my sleepless nights..but my kid was still lying next to me..
I shouldn't be stressed over small matters
and so Saturday I woke up with different feeling..I felt I have gained an understanding that made me feel ready to face the day and his crankiness. To my surprise the change of my heart really made my day. I wasn't sure whether Caleb was really less cranky since saturday or it was just me who didn't really bother with the cry anymore..
and that saturday morning.. I hugged Caleb and told him 'Caleb, even if you fail and disappointed me many times, I will always love you and take care of you and will never abandon you'.
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