Doa Bapa Kami untuk anak

 Dear parents,

Pardon me if my post today is written in Indonesian. I just listened to this wonderful sermon by Ps. Philip Mantofa and he shared how we should pray for our children.
Here's the outline I noted:

Doa bapa kami utk anak - ps philip mantofa: Mat 6

6 guidance berdoa utk anak
1. Ay 9: Bapa kami yg di sorga dikuduskanlah namaMu
Artinya:  Bapa perkenalkanlah diriMu pada anak kami
Pengetahuan agama manusia bisa diberi lwt sunday sch, ortu mengajar
ttg Yesus, lwt kotbah dll, tapi pengalaman hanya dtg dari Bapa. Tdk
seorgpun dtg padaKu kecuali Bapa menariknya.
Kita bisa kenal Tuhan krn ada org yg mendoakan kita (entah itu ortu,
sodara, karyawan dll).
Perlu kuasa Bapa, ini di luar kemampuan kita.
Anak kita lahir sbg org yg terhilang, tanggung jwb kita utk mendoakan
anak, menabur spy kenal Tuhan.

2. Ay 10: datanglah kerajaanMu, jadilah kehendakMu di bumi spt di sorga
Artinya: Bapa aturlah masa depan anakku
Krn sebagian bsr hdp anak kita tdk bisa dikontrol oleh kita. E.g. Dgn
siapa dia fall in love. Byk anak org baik2 jth cinta dgn org yg salah.

3. Ay 11: berikanlah pada kami makanan kami yg secukupnya
Artinya: Bapa bekalilah anak kami dgn kelebihan2 yg dari padaMu
E.g. Roh yg takut akan Tuhan
Dan jg Tuhan tambahkan bakat2 pada anak kita..
Kdg ortu tdk bisa memberi berkat harta yg berlimpah pada anak, krn itu
perlu utk kita berdoa spy anak kita diberi byk talenta dari Tuhan
Dgn byk cinta yg kita tunjukan pada anak, pasti komunikasi dgn anak
itu jalan dan Tuhan akan bukakan byk hal lwt itu.

4. Ay 12: dan ampunilah kami akan kesalahan kami spt kami pun
mengampuni yg bersalah pada kami
Artinya: koreksilah keluarga kami spy kami tidak kena kutuk.. Ada
kepahitan tidak, penyembahan berhala, kecanduan rokok atau
minuman/pornografi dll
Krn anak kita berhasil tergantung dari keluarga juga

5. Ay 13: dan jgnlah membawa kami dlm pencobaan tp lepaskanlah kami
dari yg jahat
Artinya: Bapa kirimkanlah malaikat2Mu utk menjaga keluarga kami dan anak2 kami
Makin anak tmbh besar, makin dikit kontrol ortu pada anak...jd di luar
kontrol kita, itu tugas dari Roh Kudus, utk memberikan keselamatan
hidup bagi anak kita. Roh kudus jg yg akan berbicara dan memberikan
nilai2/prinsip2 yg memberi hidup dan berkat bagi anak2 kita.
Tugas malaikat adl menjaga keselamatan kita (body guards service)

6. Ay 13b: krn Engkaulah yang empunya kerajaan Sorga skrg dan selamanya.
Artinya: 1. Bapa engkau sanggup! - deklarasi iman dari akhir doa kita
- 2.dan kami memujiMu selamanya (naikkan doamu dgn pujian). Doa yg
disertai pujian itu berbeda. 3. Di dalam nama Yesus amin (hanya 1
nama) - hanya dlm nama Yesus doa kita pasti dpt jawaban.

if you are interested to listen the full version of the sermon, you may go to his website:
www.philipmantofa.com

Good quality time

Now that I'm no longer a full time stay at home mother, I really have to wisely manage my time so that I can have time for my family. Besides working as a part time administrator, I also have my ministry and church activities. That already takes 3-4x a week. and I have one special day that I only go out on a date with hubby. I know that all working mothers are very busy and admit it, there are times you feel guilty for not spending enough time with your kids.

I have come to realize that it is not the amount of time you give to your kid. But whether you use that certain amount for some really good quality and bonding time with your kid. You see...we may be in the same house, seeing him in the living room playing his blocks,  while we are doing something else. Yes, you are with him but you are not spending time with him.

Everyday I make sure I have time for my son. and not just spending or wasting time with him but this has to be a real good quality time. How do I spend my quality time with Caleb? I walk with him in the park and while walking, I talk to him, sing to him, joke with him. I create learning time in a fun way so that he can still giggle. We go swimming together or go somewhere else without the maid, just us. and finally, my fave quality time ever is....the bedtime rituals!!! this is when I read books and pray with him before he sleeps. I hate to miss bedtime that's why as much as I can, I try to be home before bedtime.
and Oh..one more...bath time! yes, this is our fun time together too :)

Believe me when you have a good quality time with your kid, you won't ever feel guilty everytime you leave your house. There was one day when I felt so insecured and feeling guilty when I left the house. I felt something was missing. I knew I was spending the time at home but I was tired and I took nap and when I woke up, Caleb was already out at the playground with my maid and before he went home, I already had to leave again. I was thinking and thinking and came to realize that I have not spent any good quality time with my son and that was why I felt guilty leaving him again. It would be a different story if I spent a good time with him, no matter how busy I was, and eventhough I had to leave him again in the evening, I would not feel guilty.
So mommies, it is okay to go to work, to go on a date with your hubby, to have your 'me' time, to meet your friends and so on...as long as you make sure your son get to spend a good quality time with you, you will never feel guilty.

Language development

Some babies speak early. Some later.
I am blessed to have an early talker. But here I would like to calm you down if your baby has not started talking by 1 year old. First, most babies start talking when they are two years old. Most kids in my church started talking when they reached three. Second, they have not talked do not mean they do not understand all your words. Don't underestimate babies. They are SMART!

We were just watching Barney today. He used to love and watch Barney every day and then fell in love with Hi5 and Elmo and never watched Barney for quite some time. When he used to watch Barney back then, he didn't have as many vocabs as now. But today when we watched Barney sang a few songs, Caleb was actually singing along with Barney. I was surprised because first, it's been long time since we watched Barney but he remembered the song. Second, he knew exactly the words on the songs.
So I was thinking that all that time when he used to watch barney everyday, his brain recorded all the songs..word by word though he couldn't say it out. Now that he's able to say it out, those words easily come out. Amazing right...

So my point is, whatever your baby's listening to right now...his brain is recording it, compiling it in his file and saves it for future use :)
so don't worry...they'll eventually talk sooner or later!

You're not alone

My church is one of the place where you can see many young couples with babies. To be honest with you, these moms in my church are blesses\d with such angel babies. Well, I don't know exactly how easy their babies are but what I know for sure is that they are so calm, do not make so much noise, just sit quietly on their strollers, content enough playing with their mittens, pacifier, etc. And they nap well enough too. Bless those moms!

But I know that some moms out there may have babies who are not napping well and long enough. They may have been blessed with spirited babies who are very active and may not just let you sit and listen to the sermon quietly.

Don't worry. you're not alone. Many other moms experience just like you do.

Caleb never naps well when we're outside. He only takes 30-40 minutes nap when he's outside. He didn't sit quietly too in church.Most of Sunday nights, he would end up being overtired n stimulated resulting not sleeping well at night. So I have to be careful on his schedule. Usually I will put him to bed earlier at night.

I am sure whatever struggle you're going through now..be it about nap, sleep, meal time, picky eaters...
you're not alone moms... somewhere out there, there are moms who feel the same way as you do. Knowing that you're not the only one will always make you feel better :)

When everything doesnt work out...

When everything you've tried doesn't work, pray!

When Caleb did not sleep well for nights for no reason. No sign of teething, no sickness. Changed his diaper to a clean one. Set the air con to the right temperature. I wonder and wonder why. Was it the nap? Was it too much? and so I did trial and error with the nap. And stilll it didn't work.
So I prayed.
and so he slept through again.

When Caleb was cranky for no reason I could find out. I prayed.
and he soon was back to his old self, charming.

When things go wrong, and you don't know why. You've done your research. You've tried everything you know. and it still doesn't work out. Remember to pray.
Mommies, you are not alone. God is with you. He understands your struggles, your concerns and most importantly He knows and understands your baby more than you. So let Him take control.

Be Selfish

I have a friend who just gave birth 3 months ago and she is now a stay at home mother (SAHM).
When we were chatting on BBM (Blackberry Messenger), she told me how she felt guilty leaving her baby at her mom's place so that she could take a break window shopping at the mall. She felt that she was being selfish to satisfy her own need to have some 'me' time.

and this is what I said to her:

Dont feel guilty for being selfish. We-SAHM- need to be selfish sometimes. Our 'me' time is important so that we can keep our SANE in order to have a balanced life.
It is not good to be burned out. When we are tired emotionally, we tend to lose temper easily and get impatient to the people around us, including our baby.
SO don't feel guilty. Take a break. Be selfish when you get the chance to do so.
I also tell myself the same thing whenever I get the chance to spend some 'me' time..like during my recent trip to sby, I went to salon, shopping, facial...leaving hubby alone with Caleb at home.
I did feel guilty..but then I told myself...I hardly get this kind of chance..so let's be selfish this time and enjoy while I can. you deserve this. WE deserve this.

Anyway, a happy mom begets a happy baby.