Before I got married or pregnant, whenever I saw a kid at the mall throwing tantrum, I always thought to myself "what a naughty kid" or "poor mom".
Yes, it appeared to me that the mother had a very stong willed kid that would get really mad if he didn't get what he wanted.
Now that I'm a mom and has a kid who had tantrum, and also because I read about it, I know that tantrum happens. Not because my son is bad. Even an angel baby could have tantrums. They happen when your child is tired, hungry or not feeling well. So make sure he has enough rest and well fed.
Showing posts with label baby tantrums. Show all posts
Showing posts with label baby tantrums. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Sunday, February 13, 2011
The First Official Tantrum
Okay, I may have mentioned Caleb had tantrums but after today I have to ammend what I wrote. The previous tantrums were really nothing compared to what I had just witnessed today. You can say the previous ones were mini tantrums. Those tantrums happened because he did something he's not allowed to do and he cried because I told him not to.
Today's story began with yesterday when I showed him a trailer of an educational dvd from youtube. He liked it when there was a moon showing at the end of the trailer and he only wanted to see that part n requested that I repeat it over and over again. He was quite upset and grumpy when I decided to have enough of that yesterday.
And today after we just reached home from church, he unfortunately remembered that youtube trailer and asked about the "moon video" so I played for him. Sad thing the same thing happened all over again and even worse because he was really angry when I said I didn't want to repeat playing it. He was very angry and threw tantrum. The biggest one so far, yes, at 23rd month I finally witnessed it! I can understand why this is not the same like the previous ones. The previous ones were because he was not allowed to do something he KNEW it was wrong to do, this ONE is because he wanted something so BADLY and didn't understand why he couldn't get it (why mommy refused to replay for him) and that's why he was angry.
I knew it was going to be a tantrum so I brought him to his room and close the door to have a time out to cool him down. What I did not expect was this led to a bigger tantrum than in the past.
He was stomping his foot, kicking and fell down sitting on the floor. He was SCREAMING in anger.
my hubby was in the room with me and I asked him not to give him any attention he wanted.
Caleb was even angrier when he wanted me to carry him but I refused. He hugged me and because he saw that I didn't do anything he was stomping and kicking again and so I put him on the bed again. I kept telling him "we can get out and watch Hi5 after you stop crying". I told him too " i know you're angry but you cannot keep watching that when I tell you to stop. it was enough". He stopped and stared at me when he heard me say "i know you're angry" as if he understood that I acknowledged his feeling, but oh well, he was still angry and then continued his screaming and stomping.
To be honest, as a first time mom and my first time experience to witness my son having his first real tantrum, I was quite shocked but thank God I remain calm and in control (this is important! don't let your kid read that you are panic and not in self control, his tantrum could get worse). But I admit I gave in and hugged him and then carried him. He stopped crying immediately and I told him "that is good that you stop crying now. Remember you cannot ask mommy to replay over and over again when mommy say enough, okay? now let's go out and watch hi5"
you know what....we went out of the room, and he was a happy content kid watching hi5, like nothing ever happened before!!! he was even smiling to me!! Goddd....what did just happen??? LOL
but I guess that was tantrum. it's done when it's done. and that what's time out for, to cool him down, to wait til he's done throwing tantrum.
I thank God my first experience having my son's tantrum was in my house and not while we're out! I might get more panic if I was outside. To be honest, it was quite traumatic. I hope it wont happen again.
Here is my observation why this tantrum happened. and I admit it was my lack of wisdom.
First, I should have learned from yesterday that this could end the same. I shouldn't let him watch that again
Second, he was hungry and tired at that time. This was the main cause that triggered the tantrum. We were out since morning til 5pm and I didnt give him his milk before he napped because I thought he had lunch and then ate some french fries before he went down to sleep. But my fault was I didn't pay attention at how much he ate before he napped. We shared the french fries. My hubby and I probably ate more than him. Sigh...
But tantrums happen. at least once in your child's life, it is unavoidable. I just pray it wont happen too often and than when it happens, I am more prepared and have more control n be calm enough.
Today's story began with yesterday when I showed him a trailer of an educational dvd from youtube. He liked it when there was a moon showing at the end of the trailer and he only wanted to see that part n requested that I repeat it over and over again. He was quite upset and grumpy when I decided to have enough of that yesterday.
And today after we just reached home from church, he unfortunately remembered that youtube trailer and asked about the "moon video" so I played for him. Sad thing the same thing happened all over again and even worse because he was really angry when I said I didn't want to repeat playing it. He was very angry and threw tantrum. The biggest one so far, yes, at 23rd month I finally witnessed it! I can understand why this is not the same like the previous ones. The previous ones were because he was not allowed to do something he KNEW it was wrong to do, this ONE is because he wanted something so BADLY and didn't understand why he couldn't get it (why mommy refused to replay for him) and that's why he was angry.
I knew it was going to be a tantrum so I brought him to his room and close the door to have a time out to cool him down. What I did not expect was this led to a bigger tantrum than in the past.
He was stomping his foot, kicking and fell down sitting on the floor. He was SCREAMING in anger.
my hubby was in the room with me and I asked him not to give him any attention he wanted.
Caleb was even angrier when he wanted me to carry him but I refused. He hugged me and because he saw that I didn't do anything he was stomping and kicking again and so I put him on the bed again. I kept telling him "we can get out and watch Hi5 after you stop crying". I told him too " i know you're angry but you cannot keep watching that when I tell you to stop. it was enough". He stopped and stared at me when he heard me say "i know you're angry" as if he understood that I acknowledged his feeling, but oh well, he was still angry and then continued his screaming and stomping.
To be honest, as a first time mom and my first time experience to witness my son having his first real tantrum, I was quite shocked but thank God I remain calm and in control (this is important! don't let your kid read that you are panic and not in self control, his tantrum could get worse). But I admit I gave in and hugged him and then carried him. He stopped crying immediately and I told him "that is good that you stop crying now. Remember you cannot ask mommy to replay over and over again when mommy say enough, okay? now let's go out and watch hi5"
you know what....we went out of the room, and he was a happy content kid watching hi5, like nothing ever happened before!!! he was even smiling to me!! Goddd....what did just happen??? LOL
but I guess that was tantrum. it's done when it's done. and that what's time out for, to cool him down, to wait til he's done throwing tantrum.
I thank God my first experience having my son's tantrum was in my house and not while we're out! I might get more panic if I was outside. To be honest, it was quite traumatic. I hope it wont happen again.
Here is my observation why this tantrum happened. and I admit it was my lack of wisdom.
First, I should have learned from yesterday that this could end the same. I shouldn't let him watch that again
Second, he was hungry and tired at that time. This was the main cause that triggered the tantrum. We were out since morning til 5pm and I didnt give him his milk before he napped because I thought he had lunch and then ate some french fries before he went down to sleep. But my fault was I didn't pay attention at how much he ate before he napped. We shared the french fries. My hubby and I probably ate more than him. Sigh...
But tantrums happen. at least once in your child's life, it is unavoidable. I just pray it wont happen too often and than when it happens, I am more prepared and have more control n be calm enough.
Monday, May 10, 2010
the tantrums
I had read the baby whisperer again when Caleb was 10 months old..I was reading the toddler section. Realising that he would reach toddlerhood soon, I thought I should equip myself with some knowledge. So I came to know what it is called a tantrum phase, this is when your baby throws you a tantrum when he is angry or upset.
When I was in Jakarta, my nephew who at that time around 14 months had shown tantrums many times when I was there. He was arching his back and if you didn't catch him he could bang his head on the floor. I watched it and I was not surprised because I have read about it. I acted cool so that his mom did not need to feel embarassed. I knew it would happen to Caleb soon. This phase is just unavoidable.
Now Caleb is 13,5 months old and yes he is now finally in this phase. He would arch his back whenever he is upset and sometimes not only acrhing and crying but also screaming. Hmm..
But yes so far I just act cool..thank God I have read about it.
Anyway..
So I'm gonna write here some information I remember from reading the book, people's blogs and other resources about handling your child's tantrum:
1. Just act cool
a child can catch your emotions and if you are upset, he will be upset too. so be careful.
2. Remove him
let's say you're in supermarket and he's throwing tantrums that draw people's attention..get him out of there.
3. Talk to him
Tell him you understand that he is upset because .......
a child feels better when he is understood and tell him he needs to learn how to control his emotion too
4. Give him rewards when he has done well
5. if nothing works just let him finish his tantrums or just go home
When I was in Jakarta, my nephew who at that time around 14 months had shown tantrums many times when I was there. He was arching his back and if you didn't catch him he could bang his head on the floor. I watched it and I was not surprised because I have read about it. I acted cool so that his mom did not need to feel embarassed. I knew it would happen to Caleb soon. This phase is just unavoidable.
Now Caleb is 13,5 months old and yes he is now finally in this phase. He would arch his back whenever he is upset and sometimes not only acrhing and crying but also screaming. Hmm..
But yes so far I just act cool..thank God I have read about it.
Anyway..
So I'm gonna write here some information I remember from reading the book, people's blogs and other resources about handling your child's tantrum:
1. Just act cool
a child can catch your emotions and if you are upset, he will be upset too. so be careful.
2. Remove him
let's say you're in supermarket and he's throwing tantrums that draw people's attention..get him out of there.
3. Talk to him
Tell him you understand that he is upset because .......
a child feels better when he is understood and tell him he needs to learn how to control his emotion too
4. Give him rewards when he has done well
5. if nothing works just let him finish his tantrums or just go home
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